mmm
like i mentioned before, please dont sing. haha
The vocals are a little faint, maybe want to clarify that a little. The melody is good i suppose, you could throw in a bridge that accually breaks the standing melody, but its good as it is. might wanna cut the ending as well, its a bit long..
that kinda wraps it up, keep in mind to come up with better texts in your upcoming songs. yeah..